Selfish or Self Aware?

At work, a co-worker mentioned a person who said that she didn't want to have children because she wanted to spend her money on herself.  Another co-worker said that was selfish ...was it?

Is not wanting to have children (whatever the reason) selfish or is it self aware?  And is being selfish a problem?

I think that having children should be a decision made for the right reasons - you WANT children, you love children and you're willing to make the sacrifices to lifestyle and life required by having children.  In this case, the reason (spending money on oneself) may be shallow but it certainly isn't selfish in my opinion - it's a reflection of that person's realization that children don't fit into her preferred lifestyle.  Will that change - could be or it could be this person actually knows herself very well.

I've never regretted having children.  They've been a crucial part of my life and have helped me move forward during some very rough times. However, I have to admit that, looking back, my life would have been significantly different without them.  Not better, but definitely different.  I wouldn't be living in the house I am and probably wouldn't be in the town I'm in - because there wouldn't have been anything (other than my job at the time) to have kept me here 21 years ago when life changed so much.

Now that my children are grown and on their own - is it selfish that I spend more money on myself? Basically that's the same as the person who doesn't want children in order to spend more on herself isn't it?

Anyway - it's just something to think about.  I don't think, with or without children, that being a bit selfish is a problem.  As long as others aren't hurt or suffer, your bills and necessities are taken care of first and you're not going into debt with things you can't afford ever - then pampering yourself once in a while and putting yourself first isn't a bad thing.  Your children will grow and leave you - you have to live with yourself and be happy with yourself your entire life - might as well enjoy it if you can!