What a nice Christmas this was!  Good food, laughs and fun with both sons and grand-dog!  Poor Freyja was terribly intimidated by Seven although Freyja is taller and heavier.  After one trip outside together, Frey came running in, ran to her crate and looked as though she was begging someone to shut the door - QUICK!

Such a big girl now!

September 2012

Wish the rug still looked that good!  It's going to the garage and then the garbage this weekend! 

Puppies!

December 2012

Lincoln

This weekend I decided to do something I haven't done for some time - go to a movie.

I've heard a lot about Lincoln and thought that would be the best one this time.

It was wonderful!  I thought I knew a bit about Lincoln - but there was more to learn.  Additionally, it was fascinating to see the "behind the scenes" work on the 13th Amendment.

Daniel Day Lewis was wonderful as were Tommy Lee Jones and Sally Field.  I'm looking forward to seeing how many awards this movie wins.

PS IMHO this should be mandatory viewing for all high school students - it may be fiction but there was definitely something to learn and it might just spark the desire to find out more information!

Christmas Tree of Books 2012

Silver Anniversary

This year I got my 25 year pin and gift at the annual Service Awards - I can't believe that I've been at my place of employment 25 years or that I've been in Virginia Beach for longer than that.  It definitely wasn't the plan . . . for the past 20 years I should have been in Michigan but, while I will always love Michigan, it's probably a good thing that we hadn't already moved when Harry died.  I was able to keep my job, the house here and the kids in their schools - all positive things.

I never thought I'd still be working at my age either.  I had expected to retire at 50 or maybe 55 but that just wasn't possible for many reasons, primarily associated with the economy!  Besides, at those ages, I would have felt compelled to "do" something and, if I was going to work, I might as well stay where I was doing a job I liked!  Now, I'm getting to the point (not quite there yet) where I don't have the same compulsion to "do" as much as I did!

It has been a great week - Service Awards and a celebratory breakfast today - lots of good talking and fun with friends and co-workers.  I'm so lucky to work with people who are so much fun to be around!

December 1

A visit from a friend meant a photo op out back!

She does LOVE meeting people!!

Big GIrl

Thanksgiving 2012

It's Thanksgiving eve and all is well - and I have so much to be thankful for this year.

Starting with the simple things - dinner will be good tomorrow - turkey, potatoes, dressing, rolls, shrimp, salad, peas, cranberry sauce and, of course, pies.  It will be nice to have dinner together.

My family is growing - my niece has a new baby boy and my other niece is due in early 2013.  Babies are such joy and fun and I'm enjoying seeing Nathan's pictures.

My sons are well - despite a small setback for B earlier this fall, he's doing well and continuing with his education.  S is well also (although I don't hear from him as often as I might like, I know he's well). I'm healthy and enjoying my life.  I get to go to plays at the Kennedy Center and hope to plan a true vacation for 2013.  My job is doing well and I'm looking forward to retirement in a few years.

I'm still working on my house and things are progressing nicely - there's always something that needs to be done but I'm thankful for what's been accomplished and hopeful about will be done in the future.

I hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving with family and friends - and that the upcoming year is wonderful.

Mini vacay this week

It's been a wonderful week off (well one week minus one day) and I've enjoyed the time although, as usual, I over-estimated the work I would get done.  I've gotten Thanksgiving planned and ready to go; I've gotten laundry done and have worked through a cold - unfortunately Bry got a cold too so both of us have been under the weather all week.  (Luckily there was a 10 for $10 sale on soup so I was able to make sure we had plenty to tide us over! :) )

I'm finding that, as I get older (wiser?) and closer to the idea of retirement, I'm not missing work as I used to when I took off.  When the kids were little, our vacations were usually traveling to family so there wasn't time to think, but later, when I took time off (particularly when I wasn't actually going somewhere) it was harder to disconnect.  Not so much any more.  I did check email (about twice this week) but other than that - nada!

Oh well - on to next week and Thanksgiving!

War Horse

I never have (and probably never will) see the movie, but the play was wonderful.

The story isn't unique or new and can be guessed far in advance but the horses are incredible.  Both Joey (as a foal and an adult) and Topthorn, along with the draft horses who are near death are so believable despite the fact that you can see the people manipulating them and they're skeletons are metal.

I was worried about this play - particularly since I was certain I wouldn't want to see the movie but I'm glad that I decided to go and that the Kennedy Center produced it.  A good time, even with the expected tears!

Weekends

Another Saturday at work - the usual winter effect due to the cold weather - not pleasant that's for sure but we got through it.  

One difference is that this weekend I'm alone at home - just me, the dog and the two cats - so alone may be the wrong word!  It's different being here by myself - haven't done that for a while but it's ok. I have to say that I miss having someone to talk to - yes, I talk to people all day long but that's different than actually talking with someone you care about and with whom you want to have a conversation.  But all in all, I can talk to the puppy, the cats and even the television!  There isn't a lot of give and take but that's ok too!

I put the heater in the downstairs bathroom.  I don't think that anything is going to freeze (at least not yet) but it's cool there even with the downstairs at 68 degrees and Cleo is huddling next to the vent!  I'm sure she'll enjoy the extra heat and it's ready for when the temps do get lower and that pipe becomes vulnerable to freezing!

Next weekend is a trip to DC for a play at the Kennedy Center! YIPPEE!!

Lap Puppy

Caught in mid-struggle!  She's so NOT a cuddle puppy, much as I would like her to be! She's much more of a bitey puppy!

Bry can pick her up now, but she's getting too big for me - just under 40 lbs. now!

Sandy

I can't say that I'm sorry to see Sandy leave - especially after 3 days of rain - but I'm very sorry that she went north and did such damage to New York and New Jersey.

Politics

I enjoy politics most of the time - I used to enjoy it more but over the past several years it's gotten harder and harder to deal with the nastiness and animosity of American politics.  It's particularly difficult with the advent of online commentary and commenting.

I like to read comments and I continually hope that reasonable discourse will take place!  More often than not, however, there's no real dialog, just a lot of ranting (on and off topic) and name-calling involved.  It's a shame because I think we learn by listening to different opinions and different viewpoints.  It challenges our beliefs and forces us to refine our opinions in order to civilly and courteously put forth our views.

But - in today's world the norm is yelling, anger, close mindedness (is that a word!) and sheer ignorance.  It truly appalls me that many people are ranting (commenting) over issues about which they know next to nothing!  People holler about protecting the Constitution yet obviously have never read the Constitution or the Bill of Rights.  Some argue that the "Founding Fathers" (who would be amazed at their veneration!) were "Christian" but have obviously never read much about those whom they venerate.

And, as for being Christian, many are giving the entire religion a bad name.  The Christ I read about and learned about cared about people.  He wanted to help people - not bash them, or hate them or hurt them.  He tried to convince them to change to his beliefs but, at least in my world, he didn't attack those who didn't. What has been done (and is still being done) in the name of Christ is horrible and it's hurtful to watch.

Anyway, this election cycle will soon be over.  I have my fingers crossed for my desired outcome.  But whatever the outcome, I can only hope the animus will lessen and that we can come together as Americans to make our country the best it can be.  I can dream . . . 

Growing So Fast

August 24, 2012 - 3 months old!

October 22, 2012 -    5 months old!

Sleep

So very tired - got up about 3:45 to feed the cats & dog and couldn't go back to sleep - SIGH!  Made for a long day and now a long evening but bedtime is coming soon.  I don't actually mind getting up to feed everyone as long as I can get back to sleep!

Freyja update

Another Saturday, another trip to the vet!  On September 1, Freya weighed 17.5 lbs., today she weighed 28.7 lbs!  11.2 lbs in a month!! And we're supposed to increase the amount of food she's eating - heaven knows what her weight will be next month! Because all of her flea and heartworm medicine is weight based, we're still at the one or two doses at a time!

Sunday

Another split weekend but all is good - and today was a good, fairly productive day!  Got all three bathrooms cleaned (yay have 3 bathrooms to clean!); all my laundry is done (still needs to be put away); downstairs dusted (upstairs later tonight) and I've had time to relax.

There are always more things to do but each little bit done gives me pleasure! :)

Busy weekend

Even though my weekend was split (worked Saturday), a lot got done - well, some things got done, meaning that there's less to be done later!

On Friday, new garage door openers were installed -  YAY - making it much easier for Bryan and me to get in and out of the house.  His car goes in the garage (mine doesn't) but it's a shorter distance from my car to the garage than from my house to the front door so it's a benefit to me too!  While moving some things for the installer, I was able to get rid of a couple of more things too - and rearrange some others.  Now the fence will be fixed on Monday (I hope) and that's two things crossed off my list.

Sunday I had enough of looking at the poor dog and cat abused chair and ottoman in the family room.  There were two recliners (one smaller than the other) in the room over the garage that were in much better shape.  So today I went up there, moved and rearranged some things to make it easier to get to the recliner and dragged it downstairs.  Only a minor struggle to get it through the door!  :)  (Of course Quincy went into the front of the house behind closed doors, Freyja went into her crate and I moved Cleo's gate back so that she couldn't "help"!)  Once it was downstairs, I carried the ottoman up (not bad) and dragged the chair to the door.  Once the cushions were off, the chair was turned on its side, I was able to drag it, step by step upstairs.  I must say that I'm glad there aren't more stairs to the room over the garage! :)

My problem is that the recliner is blue.  Not a major problem now, since the sofa is also blue (with a great leaf pattern that I really love) but I'm thinking of having slipcovers make for it that wouldn't be blue.  The walls are green (a British khaki green) that surprisingly the leaves in the blue sofa fabric goes VERY well with!  The chairs were yellow - but I'd like the one remaining downstairs to be slip covered - maybe a pattern that would combine blue and green?  I have pillows for the slip covered sofa that are green, gold and rust - very colorful down here!

Anyway that's for next year - this year's money is needed for doors (and the reupholstered living room chairs!).  Next Friday, the bathroom will be fixed - I have to get the vanity this week (and hope that it's still available!) SIGH!

Growing up!

 6 weeks - picking out the puppy!  July 8, 2012

 

15 Weeks  September 9, 2012

Such a change!

New Home List

Ok - here's my new list:

1. retractable awning for back yard - next year's tax return?
2. slipcovers for family room sofa and one chair (have estimate for the sofa - tax refund again?)
3. reupholster recliner
4. slipcover other chair and ottoman 
5. upholstered headboard?  
6. new mattress

In between all this I need to figure out the holidays - and make plans for some decorating!

Progress

Since I wrote about my necessary home repairs, I have made some progress!  New garage door openers (not on the list but definitely necessary) will be installed this month and the fence will be fixed about the same time (a couple of weeks).  Both were actually under my estimates so that's good!  I've gotten the estimates for the doors, just have to make some final decisions (including colors for new shutters and the front door).  The bathroom problems are being looked at early next week for an estimate and I'm afraid that will be more than I anticipate but I'm keeping my fingers crossed!  In any event, that should be completed by the end of the month (at least I hope so) so that will be another item checked off!

Still waiting to do more cleaning - it's simply too hot and humid to do more than take my 20 minute walk once (or twice) a day!

Stuck

Sometimes I feel stuck . . . stuck in one mood, stuck in one place, just plain stuck.  I guess realizing that fact is step one to getting unstuck but it's hard sometimes to know where to start.  I know I have things that HAVE to be done and usually that's a good thing because it provides motivation.

But not always.  I've been procrastinating on several things and I'm afraid I've created a bigger problem by doing so.  However, continued procrastination isn't going to fix anything and, in fact, will allow the situation to continue to deteriorate.

SO - I'm off next week and I MUST address the situations head on!!  Wish me luck!

Saturday

Good trip to the vet - love the early morning appointments - we were there at 8 and home by 8:20!!  Freyja now weighs 17.5 lbs., + 5 lbs in 3 weeks!  She is so excited to meet people - not so much to meet dogs - but she loves people!

After a nap, we made a trip outside between rain showers!  YAY!  Now she's got one of her favorite things - an ice cube!

Friday

The week is ending on a far lighter note than it started - and that's a great thing!

Freyja goes to the vet tomorrow for her last puppy shot - all seems well with her and she's been a dream this week - spending more time than before in her crate but happily so - it's been a great relief!

She's doing wonderfully in her housebreaking - it's very rare these days that she has accidents in the house (probably because she's spending more time in her crate) and she's getting daily walks (at least one and I'm aiming for two) that are getting longer and longer each week.  We walk at a fairly quick pace so right now we're only gone about 10-15 minutes but it does seem to drain a bit of energy out of her! (and it certainly can't hurt me!)

Reflections

I used to think all Moms wanted everything just right for their kids - and worked hard to make sure that it was - and I know that there were times I felt that I hadn't done all that I could have.  (This isn't the "helicopter Mom syndrome" where the child doesn't get to make any mistakes or anything - but the desire to have your kids happy and well-adjusted.)  Then I read news stories about Moms killing their children, often for no apparent reason.

I can't imagine - I'd rather take the pain myself any day than have one of my children hurt or in pain. To actually cause them physical pain or take their life is beyond my wildest imagination.  Life is so very strange and it's getting stranger (or so it seems) the older I get.

On a side note:  I was at a meeting this week talking about Envision 2040 - 28 years from now - it's very hard to imagine since there's a very real possibility that I won't be here then!

Home Repair

I have more things to do to the house . . . aren't there ALWAYS more things to do to a house??  I have the name of someone to call for the bathroom (leak and floor repair) and I've gotten one estimate for new doors (front and patio).  I know I should get another estimate (I actually was given one that was so outrageous that I didn't even consider it for a minute) but these are the people who did the windows and I was so pleased with that experience!!

So far my list is:

• bathroom
• doors
• fence (at least one side and a gate)
• closet organizer (my room)
• garage clean out (when it's cooler)

As I said - it never ends!!

Freyja update

She's getting bigger and bigger every day - and some days she's just so full of energy! She pesters the cats something terrible most of the time  -  Cleo lives behind a baby gate - primarily for her sake and also to protect the litter box!  Quincy insists on coming down and then growling and hissing at Freyja.

Bryan took these pictures today - her ears almost always stand up - tho the left one still slants in sometimes in a cone-head position.

But she's a very good puppy - we were up very early this morning but after Cleo's pill, Freyja went back into her cage and I went back to bed! Later in the afternoon she went back in for a late nap.


Almost time for a last trip outside and then bed - for both of us! :)

Freyja

It's been a while since I posted and I've gotten a new puppy! :) She's wonderful and beautiful - even when she's chewing on my toes!

It's been quite an exciting week with her - she came home on July 22 - and was a good girl right away.  We're going through some puppy issues but for the most part all is good.  She loves her crate and goes inside all the time.  She rarely fusses at night and, if it weren't for the cats, she'd sleep a lot longer!  Quincy is sleeping upstairs (but that might not last much longer if he doesn't stop waking me up so early) and Cleo is downstairs in the laundry area (with a baby gate).  Unfortunately, Cleo wakes up early and walks under the gate in front of Freyja's cage thus waking her up!

For the first two days she went outside on the leash beautifully - now not so much!  But she does go outside (although first thing in the morning she's not thrilled with the damp grass) and hasn't had too many accidents in the house.  (Last Saturday not withstanding!)

Her first vet visit was tonight.  She weighs 12.2 lbs., has fleas (SIGH) and medicine, possibly a blocked tear duct (with eye drops) and was wormed.  She's exhausted and I must admit so am I!  It's been so long since I've had a puppy or kitten (Cleo & Quincy came grown!) that I'm feeling very much like a first time Mom and worried about everything!  All in all we're going to be fine and she's going to be a joy to have around.

I'm trying to decide if I'm going to register her with AKC - her name would be Misty Ridge's Freyja.

Cleo Update

Cleo's checkup went well - it's too soon to recheck her phenobarbital levels but they were able to check her blood and make sure that her anemia was improving.  It is!  Last week the level was 20% - this week 26%.  30 is considered normal so she's almost there.  Vitamins and adjusting her meds have made such a difference! And today she weighed 11.7 lbs - up from 11.6!  :)

As far as her fleas go, they're going!  The ones she has are lethargic and dying.  Hopefully another dose of Advantage in a couple of weeks and another bath will have them on the run!  Definitely want them on their way out before the puppy arrives.

We're working on her name - we have a couple - and I thought we'd picked one a couple of days ago but then I began second-guessing (of course).  Freyja (Norse goddess) (pronounced Fray ya) was what we'd thought of.  But I also liked Anya and Becka.  Decisions!

New Family Member

Two Weeks . . .

Cleo had a visit with the vet today.  She weighs 11.6 lbs. and is a bit anemic - hopefully because of fleas which we've had trouble getting under control.  There is a pill that would kill all the fleas but one of the side effects is seizures - not good in a cat with seizures!  Anyway, she had another bath, I've been washing her blanket and the towels used in her bath and tomorrow she can have Advantage.  The dr. was concerned that her phenobarb levels might be a bit off as she's still unsteady on her feet.  The blood tests will be in tomorrow (along with a test for thyroid problems).  She's eating, drinking, using the potty and sleeping.  She's also got new vitamins to take twice a day.

I just feel so bad for her - it's not far from what her life was before but to see her struggle with walking is difficult.  I hope we can get this under some kind of control and give her (and me) a good quality of life.  If B wasn't home, there'd be almost no way for me to get away for more than a few hours (now doesn't that sound selfish?).

She's being so sweet about everything . . .

Revelations

Ok, I admit it - I love Cleo for all her not caring all that much for me!  And to prove it, I went to Walmart this evening (7 p.m.) to get her a new litter box.  She needs one shorter - I'm thinking that the deeper one was difficult for her to climb in and out of which is why she was using the floor!  Plus she'd put her front paws in the box and just be too tired or weak to get all of her in there!

Also got some plastic carpet runner - Thank You Kim! - from Home Depot for those times when nothing else works.  It should help the rug (which was great at protecting the floor) and I can easily clean the plastic!

Whew . . .

What a hot weekend!  And a great trip to DC and back with a fantastic musical (Memphis) at the Kennedy Center.  If you get a chance to see this - do. The music is wonderful and the voices were extraordinary!  As we were leaving, a mother told her child that the play was too long - especially the first act - both my friend and I looked at each other in amazement because we certainly didn't agree!  Time flew during the entire performance!

Cleo seems to be improving in small ways each day. She walks fairly well - especially if going for dinner - is eating and drinking well.  She goes and lies in her sunbeam each day (and had to search for it a little today because I'd lowered the shades on the patio door a bit to help with the heat!  Of course I relented and opened it more so she could have a good spot!

I'm off for a few days so I decided to make a list of what I'd like to accomplish!

1. groceries
2. laundry
3. vet (for Cleo)
4. clean kitchen completely including the floor

There's more, of course, but this is a good start and completely doable! (I think!)

Long week . . .

Cleo came home on Monday - she's on phenobarbital which makes it hard for her to walk but she's eating, drinking and using her bathroom so things are better.  She's getting onto a better schedule with her meds so it will be easier to keep her on one every 12 hours!  Quincy has not been happy - he seemed glad to see her but later Monday began hissing at her and acting silly.  I've had to put his food on the bench (Cleo will eat all of hers and then scarf his down too - side effect!) and he's not been happy with that.  Hopefully he'll adjust - after all it's only been a few days.


Monday night I slept downstairs - actually slept for about 2 hours then was up and holding Cleo - unfortunately the position wasn't good and when I stood up the back of my knee was VERY sore!  I eventually gave up and went upstairs at 4 a.m. - got another 2 hours of sleep before going to work!  I've been less worried lately but still haven't caught up on my sleep.  But I keep trying!  


Anyway, I'm hoping this weekend is much calmer than last! 

Uncertainty

Cleo is still in the hospital.  She had 2 seizures there (the last on Saturday afternoon) so it was decided to start her on anticonvulsants.  Because they take some time to build up in the blood and she's home alone for longer periods of time, the vet recommended and I agreed to "phenobarbital loading" where she was given injections of phenobarbital (with IV fluids) to build the levels more quickly.  She'll come home Monday morning (hopefully) and be on pills.   A prescription has been called in so I'll pick that up later this afternoon.

I need to ask the vet about the puppy - I don't want to trigger more anxiety in Cleo but I'm hoping that we can go ahead - and the puppy will be kept away from her much of the time.  SIGH - when things happen they certainly happy with a vengeance!

Highs and Lows

What a busy, fun week!  We were incredibly busy (Summer Reading Program started) with Crafty Monday and the kick-off program on Wednesday with Ryan the Balloon Guy (LOVE him!).  60+ attended the craft day where they made dream catchers and over 100 kids and 60 parents came to see Ryan and the Lion's Club.  The building was hopping!  We were a few staff members short but we all pulled together and things got done - tiring tho!

Then, I had my favorite meetings (tho I couldn't stay for all of one because of staffing shortages) where we always have a lot of fun and accomplish quite a bit.  I only have another 6 months on one of the teams - I'm really going to miss it but all good things come to an end and change isn't a bad thing no matter how difficult it can be!

I started this post last night with Cleo sleeping on the sofa beside me.  As I was typing she fell off the sofa (I thought she'd gotten caught in the throw) but she was actually having a seizure.  Bryan and I took her to the Emergency Vet where they kept her.  She had another seizure around midnight this morning and the dr. called me to let me know.  She said that her blood and urine tests were normal but she had stool backed up.  All day I've been waiting (I called this morning and she was ok and I decided to wait until 5) to call back.  She'd had another seizure this afternoon and we're going to start anticonvulsant therapy.  She was given an enema after the valium for the seizure took effect and apparently cleaned herself out!  She is eating and drinking.  They're keeping her overnight again to see how she tolerates the medicine (well I hope).  To determine exactly why this is happening we'd have to take her to a neurologist (NC State or Richmond).  She absolutely hates travel, she's 13 years old and I don't want her to be upset anymore than absolutely necessary.  If the medicine works, she'll come home and we'll deal with whatever happens.  I won't have her tested, poked and prodded just to make me feel better - if she's not seizing and is comfortable, eating, drinking and eliminating that's all I can hope for.

Needless to say, last night and today have been highly emotional - I did sleep but not very long and have done nothing all day but watch (or have on) mindless tv - I didn't even want to engage enough to actually watch anything that required thought.

SRP

Today was the beginning of the Summer Reading Program and the start of Oceanfront's Crafty Mondays programs.  This Monday was dream catchers and very popular!  Next Monday is paper plate fish to be decorated as the kids like.

SRP registration is via the web - and despite great trepidation among some of the staff, the public has apparently had little problem with the new process.  And that's a good thing because ultimately I think the new process will save us a lot of time (I know it will for data entry alone) and I think people will be happy to be able to access their accounts from home.

Even tho I can't win the big raffle prize, I did enter!  I can always use another pen (prize for finishing 5 books).

Decisions

I made a momentous (at least at this time!) decision today to get another dog.  I called the breeder where I'd gotten Sasha back in 1991.  She was such a fantastic dog, it was only natural!

We'd lost our first German Shepherd in November 1990.  After Harry's death in January '91, I decided the boys and I needed a dog.  I was reading the Washington Post one day and noticed an advertisement for German Shepherds in Gaithersburg, Maryland.  I took a chance, called and made an appointment to go up on Mother's Day.  We were able to pick out a puppy and take her home with us.  She traveled very well and she was a complete joy for 11 years.

Obviously the breeder has grown over the years - now, waiting until a puppy is 8 weeks old probably means you won't get one!  The puppy I'm interested in was born at the end of May and will be able to come home at the end of July.

I'm very excited - however, there is some concern because of the two cats who already are living here. I know they'll adjust - after all they adjusted to each other fairly well! - but it will still be traumatic for them.  On the positive side, they'll be able to whip a puppy into shape and teach her quickly who's the boss(es)!!

It's been a long time since there's been a puppy (or even a kitten) in the house.  Quincy & Cleo arrived as adults - but I'm sure we'll manage!

Selfish or Self Aware?

At work, a co-worker mentioned a person who said that she didn't want to have children because she wanted to spend her money on herself.  Another co-worker said that was selfish ...was it?

Is not wanting to have children (whatever the reason) selfish or is it self aware?  And is being selfish a problem?

I think that having children should be a decision made for the right reasons - you WANT children, you love children and you're willing to make the sacrifices to lifestyle and life required by having children.  In this case, the reason (spending money on oneself) may be shallow but it certainly isn't selfish in my opinion - it's a reflection of that person's realization that children don't fit into her preferred lifestyle.  Will that change - could be or it could be this person actually knows herself very well.

I've never regretted having children.  They've been a crucial part of my life and have helped me move forward during some very rough times. However, I have to admit that, looking back, my life would have been significantly different without them.  Not better, but definitely different.  I wouldn't be living in the house I am and probably wouldn't be in the town I'm in - because there wouldn't have been anything (other than my job at the time) to have kept me here 21 years ago when life changed so much.

Now that my children are grown and on their own - is it selfish that I spend more money on myself? Basically that's the same as the person who doesn't want children in order to spend more on herself isn't it?

Anyway - it's just something to think about.  I don't think, with or without children, that being a bit selfish is a problem.  As long as others aren't hurt or suffer, your bills and necessities are taken care of first and you're not going into debt with things you can't afford ever - then pampering yourself once in a while and putting yourself first isn't a bad thing.  Your children will grow and leave you - you have to live with yourself and be happy with yourself your entire life - might as well enjoy it if you can!

Tuesday . . .

A long meeting this afternoon - but it was productive (at least I thought so).  I enjoy seeing co-workers I don't see all the time and I really enjoy sharing information.

My next projects are fixing the fence (with a new gate) and getting a new front door.  The biggest obstacle so far is getting someone to respond to my phone messages.  I'll find someone somewhere to fix the silly thing!  The fence is becoming a bigger priority because I really want a new dog!

Rashes - still

Going into week three of the dermatitis - it's getting better - my thumb has all but cleared up and my face (where I must have wiped my face) is much better and no longer itches.  However, between my fingers and on the back of my wrist still looks bad and my fingers itch!  The rest are single blisters, like someone put one drop of acid on my wrist and it blistered - there are 5 of them! They itch some but mostly just look horrible.

I've been wearing whatever long sleeved (light weight) shirts I have - to try to hide as much as possible.  Thank goodness it's another 4 day week for me (I'm off Friday for Saturday) so I should be able to cover up!

I haven't ever had this bad a reaction and I still don't know what it was - something that just touched the back of my hand - because there's nothing on my palms!

Air Show 2012

The air show isn't usually at the Oceanfront - it's usually in the fall and at Oceana Naval Air Station but this weekend is the Patriot Festival and the air show was at the beach Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

Today at work I was off the desk at 3, grabbed the camera and went straight out the front door (we're 5 blocks from the beach) and got this picture of the Blue Angels.

At lunch, looking out the lounge window, we saw some prop planes flying by and there were F-22s that put on a show too (no pics :( ) but I've always had a soft spot for the Angels and was glad I got to see them!

New Beginnings

The week I was off I had this delivered and spent time throwing stuff away!  I have two more days (actually 4 but I think I'll have it picked up early!) to throw more things away.  Not everything will be gone, of course, but enough will be that I feel lighter!  (Silly I know)

The other thing I arranged for was new porch railings.  I wasn't sure when they'd be installed exactly but last Thursday was the day!  I must admit they're a bit jarring - not used to seeing screws in the porch railings, but they're pretty, clean and VERY white!  All in all a good decision!  Next I think will be a new front door and storm door.

Work, Rashes, Facebook

Today was my first day back at work - there's a lot to get done this week and not much week to do it!  Did accomplish a bit today - even with my outbreak of dermatitis - it is getting better (at least on my thumb where it broke out first) so I have hope that within a few more days things will look better. Right now, though, my left hand looks like I have some very contagious disease! Luckily it's only on one hand (and under my chin for some reason!) but it's on the back of my hand (good for me, bad for looks!) so I keep that hand in my lap a lot.

Facebook is just trying to drive me crazy I think.  The People You May Know recently has had a very familiar name that is coming up almost constantly.  At one time I would have said, yes I know that person, but that statement obviously was wrong - and I certainly don't know that person now.  I wish there was an Ignore or Delete or some other button or some other way to say don't show this to me any more!  SIGH.  I know it shouldn't bother me and, for the most part it doesn't, but I honestly don't need the reminder of a situation I'd rather put in the past.  Just have to ignore as much as possible I guess!

Saturday . . .

Wow - such a lot got done today and not much by me!  The entertainment unit (all three pieces) went away; the smaller fridge did too, along with a microwave, a four-poster bed; some folding chairs, AND a huge plant that was in the family room! I must admit to a twinge or two when they left - I did love the furniture or I wouldn't have bought it in the first place but I'm also SO glad that it's gone and no longer crowding my life (and house & garage).  All the stuff filled a pickup truck and the back of an SUV - I have more junk than even I thought! ;-)

The plant went home with its "family" so that's a good thing!  I also found another family treasure for Gina to take home too - her grandmother's Bible.  I'm really happy that I found it and could give it to her.  She and her husband are such good people - offering to come help with whatever I need done. They brought Bella with them and she is just gorgeous!  And getting so tall (like both of her parents!). She was so busy and loved going up and down stairs (quickly!!). It was great seeing all three of them - it's been a while!

Progress

So far the tossing is going well - the dumpster is by no means full but there's still time for much more! The garage is looking better (not great because there's just too much that must be gone through before disposition but good) - there's a clear path to the previously blocked door - and it's now possible to have new garage door openers installed (YAY).   There's also the possibility that some of the bigger, nicer stuff will be going to a garage sale for a good cause - so that's a positive!  Maybe, if I get really ambitious, I can get the smaller fridge out in the garage cleaned out so it can be sent to the garage sale too!

The rest will come - especially the "hoarder" room upstairs that won't be done this time - it's an ongoing process! At least now I'll have some space to put things :).  Next week, the new porch railings are supposed to be installed - replacing the old wooden ones that are chipped, peeling and look horrible.  The new ones will be vinyl and will, hopefully, look much much better!  Will have to post a picture!

Next project - fix the fence, get a new gate and a new front door and then, in the fall, new landscaping for the front yard.  Ah, the joys of home ownership! :)

a week off work to work at home!

This is my "birthday" leave - combined with four more days to give me a week off - and have I got plans for it!  Today was probably my slowest day - but I did do somethings!  I ordered a small occasional table from the unfinished furniture store (after checking Target & Walmart with no luck); chopped the bush back into submission and hacked the weeds down (waiting for fall for planting out front I guess); renewed my subscription to the Kennedy Center (lots of money but I can give back tickets I won't use and take friends with me occasionally and I like going!); ordered a small (10 yard) dumpster to be delivered Wednesday!!

That's when the real work begins - basically throwing all the boxes and "stuff" that's been sitting around into the dumpster!  It's here for 14 days (maximum) so I should be able to do it in parts because I'm sure that throwing some things away will open up more stuff that's been hidden for a while!  At the very least it will give me a lot more space and room to move the rest of the stuff around!

After the dumpster, I think I'm going to call Salvation Army or Goodwill to come get some other stuff (an entertainment unit that I'll never use again, a bed frame that I love but don't have any place for anymore).  Someone will get some use from them I'm sure!

Thoughts on a Wednesday evening . . .

Life is what happens to you when you're busy making other plans - John Lennon wasn't my favorite Beatle by any means but this certainly rings true for me.  And life can certainly mess up those "plans" or at least it's certainly messed up a few of mine!  But some of those should have been messed up and have led to different, yet better things.  Sometimes it's hard to recognize that the changes are needed and that something positive will come eventually.

I am truly a lucky person - and the down times are brief and relatively infrequent (despite what may appear to be evidence to the contrary here!) but they, too, are something to acknowledge and move through - one step at a time!

Lots of exciting things happening the next few weeks - massive clean up; new upholstery; painting (?!); generally putting some order to chaos - fix the outside, fix the inside - works for me!

May 13, 2012

Whew!

to me . . . : )     How's that for shameless! 

Mother's Day 2012

Mother's Day is in about 10 days and I have to say that I'm a very lucky mother!  I have two wonderful sons who are very different yet very special - caring, loving individuals who make my life so much better and fuller.

Every year I miss my mother - there are ever more questions I wish I could ask and get answered.  Why do the best questions come with age when there's no one left to provide the answers?  I also miss my husband, who, over almost 20 years, never really remembered what day my birthday was but always remembered that it was close to (if not on) Mother's Day!  Minor nudging every year helped for that year only! :)

Life. Is. Good.

Another fine mess . . .

Another weekend that won't be complete - have to go in for a couple of hours to cover lunches - two unplanned absences and a position that no longer exists means that the remaining people aren't enough to let everyone have lunch unless they want to spread it over 4 hours (one person at a time) - and we're only open 7. So I'll go in and cover and lunches will be done in the regular 2 hours.  Luckily I'd taken this afternoon off - so I get two of those 4 hours back but the weekend is still messed up . . . oh well.

Deep Sigh

I've been working on a particular project at work - it's going well and it's ready to move forward but I get the feeling, sometimes, that I'm moving backward or at the very least standing still.  And I'm not sure what to do about it.  Do I push or fight for something or do I just realize that I'm on the downhill side of my employment history and let it go (while still getting all my work done, of course!).  It's not in me to "retire on the job" but I'm not sure how much fight is still left - particularly when I don't see any advantage or purpose to the fight.

Anyway, between that and needing to get stuff done at home, I'm just plain tired much of the time.  It will get better I know, but for now I'm just a bit down. . .

40 Years - Gone in a Flash

Forty years ago next month I graduated from college with a bachelor's degree in History.

This picture was my senior picture - it's hard to remember that person sometimes.  I wonder what she would think about how our life turned out!


(Was finally able to get my scanner working again - should be fun to be able to digitize some pictures - it's so much easier to move things around in bits and bytes!)

SIGH

Had another day off today (and one tomorrow) - I'd planned on a 4 day weekend but that didn't work out so I'll be working Saturday :(.  Oh well!  Got some things done today - not much actually - but did get groceries bought and prescriptions picked up!  It was nice having a slow start to the day, with no "have to be somewhere now" deadlines.

Have some new sheets (YAY) and need to get them on the bed tomorrow so I can throw the old ones out - they're ripped!  I've been doing baby steps with the house and there's a lot more to do - have some leads on people to fix the fence (never expected that it would be so hard to find someone!) as well as replace the front porch railings with vinyl.  Noticed that one of the shutters is cracked - but that is VERY low on the priority list!

My life is pretty boring most of the time and I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing!

Another year - another filing

Finally, my taxes are done, saved and e-filed.  Will print a copy tomorrow.  Such a relief!  I don't know why I wait so long each year - especially since I had to get the last piece of the puzzle today which I know came in January but I somehow managed to misplace - it could have all be done earlier and in the bank account!  I always worry each year that I'm going to make some kind of mistake on the return and the Men in Black will show up and cart me away!  Hopefully that won't happen this year!

Next week I have a couple of days off - making a 4 day weekend and I sure will enjoy it!  Maybe I can actually get some more work done around the house!

Taxes . . . ERG

I have been dreading, and putting off, doing my taxes because I was afraid that I might have to pay this year and maybe more than I could easily handle.  I started them today (after a fight with the old computer that had prior years on it and not finding a piece of information that I need) and it looks ok.  I'll get the other information tomorrow and finish up everything - including the state - but unless things go horribly awry I shouldn't have to pay.  HAPPY DAY

Other than that it's been a nice day - lazy morning, hectic noon, and now just chilling waiting for dinner!

No chocolate bunnies for me today . . . but hope everyone else had a good Easter - complete with goodies and fun!

An emotionally charged day . . .

Today, just after I went to lunch, a huge black smoke cloud rose over the Convention Center across the street - we found out that an F/A 18 crashed into an apartment complex off of Birdneck road - just up the street from us. We watched the huge, billowing cloud from the library.

So far, we've been extremely lucky and no one, including the pilots who ejected with some injuries, have been killed.

My thoughts are with all those affected-Navy, EMS, Police, Fire, and, of course, the residents of the apartment complex.



A day later - the clean up and investigation begins.

CIL finalized

I did a presentation today about some of the things I learned and discovered at CIL this year.  Was short - about 20 minutes, but I think it was well received!  Reviewed a few websites that I thought might be of interest and gave a sneak preview of the new policies and procedures page on VBNet.

All in all a good staff meeting!

Yum

It was a Frosty kind of evening!  

And it was GREAT!

The world of Dork

Sometimes I think the world is conspiring against me . . . I plan, I really do, and then when I go to implement the plan things go awry  and often it's because of my "planning" instead of just doing something when I could have/should have initially . . . luckily it's nothing that can't be re-done and fixed but still . . .

Anyway, all in all it was a good weekend - new "faux-wood" 2" blinds in the living room and dining room so there aren't anymore "bare-naked" windows!! The lone remaining bush has been trimmed back into submission (somewhat).

Now I just HAVE to find someone to fix the fence and do the porch railings and it's been so hard . . . people aren't returning calls or calling to set up appointments as they say they will.  I don't want much but I do have to get these things fixed . . . SIGH.  More phone calls in my future.  I don't want a letter from the City!

Anonymity

There's a certain feeling of anonymity in doing an online blog - even with my name in the title of the blog and my name on the posts!

Maybe because I can write without seeing anyone and I never see anyone reading what I've written, so it's as if the reader doesn't exist and the writing is simply a cathartic expression.  A large part of that is undoubtedly because I can't believe that anyone actually does read what I write (although I have some evidence that people do!).  Could be, too, that I'm a frustrated writer who realizes that this is the closest I'll ever get to the Great American Novel or the next best selling non-fiction work!

Anyway, it IS cathartic and, although I'm not totally crazy enough to spill everything online, I enjoy getting thoughts down "on paper"!

Crystal ball

Some days I would really like a crystal ball . . . I know that times change and time marches on . . . and that no one lives forever . . . but I can tell you that I really hate that I won't be around to see how things turn out!

Maybe it's the control freak part of me that wants to make sure that things turn out the way I think they should but I honestly do know that I have no control and that things are going to be how they're going to be!



But it sure would be nice to see how things are going to be in the next 50 years or so!

(maybe a magic mirror would work as well??!!)

Interesting ideas . . . from CIL 2012

In Darien, CT, the library is using iPads for early literacy.  There's a permanently mounted iPad with an "app of the day" for children to explore each day.  Many of the apps are interactive e-books!

In addition to that, the library loans iPads in kits for 1 week.  They are pre-loaded with apps geared for children 2-5.  Provisions are made to wipe each iPad when it comes back (electronically and physically wipe!) and reload with the approved apps.



Certainly gives parents an opportunity to try the technology before purchasing and gives them a good idea of the range of apps available for everyone in the family - even the youngest members!

CIL 2012 - cont.

Well, day two is in the bag - and I've had my final dinner in DC - and, although it's been fun, I'll be glad to get home.

At dinner, by myself, I was thinking - is there anything sadder than eating dinner in a hotel by yourself and I immediately answered the question with YES I think there is!  It was good to eat alone tonight - it was a bit earlier than last night or the night before, but that's good because it means I'll be in bed earlier too!  With the drive home tomorrow that's important!

I've been to some great sessions and saw some innovative things - and there are some that I think would work at MPOW - but we'll have to see if it comes to pass!  Above my pay grade! :-)

I must say - allergies have been miserable up here - I've used almost an entire box of my tissues, not to mention the ones in the hotel room! SIGH - going to be a long spring I'm afraid.

CIL 2012

 Washington DC - Cherry Blossoms! I hadn't planned on going but was easily convinced!

Navigated the Metro and walked quite a ways!

Thanks have to go to Cindy for convincing me that I needed to go - also for the crab cake for dinner!

Saturday

What a nice day it was today!  About 70 degrees, sunny and breezy!  And, for the first time in a while, I didn't feel tired so I was out fairly early, got some errands run and came home to open the windows and do some cleaning.  Sounds crazy I know, but I enjoyed the dusting and vacuuming with the windows open and the fresh air blowing through.  Quincy certainly enjoyed the open windows and doors too!

Spent the afternoon reading a book I ILL'd - Last Train from Berlin by Howard K. Smith (yes, THAT Howard K. Smith).  I've gone back to my history roots!  I listened to a great book - In the Garden of Beasts about Ambassador Dodd and his daughter Martha in the early 1930s in Berlin.  Re-awakened my interest - my Independent Study paper in college was on the fall of Weimar and the rise of Adolf Hitler in 1932-33.  Last Train from Berlin was published in 1942 - and, after a rather slow start with (in my opinion) an overly long "introduction" to why Smith believed what he did, gives a very interesting first person account of the life and problems in Berlin, especially after the attack on Russia.  There's another new book out (I have it on hold but might get the audio!) - Hitlerland: American Eyewitnesses to the Nazi Rise to Power that's got the accounts of various journalists in Germany prior to the war.  Looking forward to reading that one too!  May have to go back and re-read Rise and Fall of the Third Reich (one of my very favorites!).  Don't think I'll attempt Mein Kampf  again though - once was enough!

Now I'm almost ready for bed - with the laundry done already I only have groceries to buy tomorrow so I'll have extra time!  Time to get ready for Computers in Libraries - going to DC on Tuesday and back Friday.

Hot!

Last Saturday it was 47 degrees - today it was 87 - way too hot for March!

I should never have to have the a/c on in March!  But it was so hot today and the upstairs was so hot that it became a necessity!

But I didn't turn it on in the car!  :-)

SIGH

(I'm sure Virginia Power is thrilled!)

Time

I don't like changing time . . . really I don't. It's much easier than it used to be because most of the electronics change themselves - just had to change the stove, microwave and coffee pot - and I didn't change those!  But the change in time is hard . . .already it's after 1 p.m. and I'm still feeling like it's just noon and I have so much time left in my day!

I know I'll adjust (I have for xx years!) but it's not easy.  But I've "Sprung Forward" . . . sigh

Friday . . .

Been an interesting week - I think all the bills are finally paid from my trip to the emergency room in December . . . I say "think" because I thought that a couple of months ago and I was wrong! I called the fence company for some estimates but haven't heard back - guess I'll have to call again next week. Lots of other small, inconsequential things . . . and now it's Friday.

I wish I could say that I have something exciting to do this weekend but I don't . . . there are things I need to do but I don't know what, or how many, of those things actually will get done!  It's supposed to storm tomorrow but maybe I'll just get in the car and go somewhere away from Virginia Beach just for a change of scenery for a few hours!  Or I may just stay in my jammies, read a good book and watch a movie while the laundry finishes!  Such decisions . . .

Leap Day

Can't let the month end without saying Happy Leap Day!  During our next leap year, my birthday will be on Mother's Day and I'll probably be (or about to be) retired.  Doesn't seem possible!

Tuesday

I did get the foyer painted but the paint color isn't the best with the wallpaper.  It'll look good in the dining room so I guess it's back to the store for a quart of something else for the foyer!  At least it doesn't take long to paint it!

Right now I'm just so sleepy!  This crazy weather - jumping from cold to warm and back again - it's a wonder we're all not sick!  The other day it was 82 degrees in February! and the next day it was 40 something!  Anyway - can't sleep right now because I want to watch my NCIS!  Of course there's that lovely little DVR that could let me sleep AND see NCIS tomorrow!

Day Off

Today I had an "extra" day off - not unexpected because I asked for it but still enjoyable!  It was a beautiful day but I didn't spend much time outside - I was doing my usual stuff that I do on a Friday or Saturday off.  I dusted, vacuumed - there's always more to do! but I also enjoyed a nice brunch type breakfast and, at noon, a wonderful nap!!

Now I'm ready to fix dinner, watch Big Bang and clean up the kitchen.  Tomorrow my car gets inspected and has its oil changed - the appointment is early (7:30) but that means that I'll have time to stop at Home Depot and get a gallon of paint.  Don't know that it will get on the walls right away but at least it will be in the house! :-)   Maybe I'll even go to Kohls and see if I can find some new clothes - how I hate clothes shopping!

A good day all around!

Another Day . . .

I find myself incapable of wallowing in self-pity or even introspection for very long - it's hard work - too hard for me to handle after working all day!  So it's over for the time being . . . and now I'm going to focus on more pleasant and fun things!  Like finding curtains that I like or getting the oil changed in my car (scheduled for this Friday BTW).  In short- the mundane, normal stuff of life.

Does this make me shallow?  Perhaps some people may think so, but, honestly, I don't care!

Life

Life is fast, allowing little time for contemplation or even thoughtful consideration.  Even when things appear to be going smoothly (or at least there aren't a lot of bumps) one more thing may come flying at you that can make everything seem overwhelming.  

That's not exactly where I am right now but it's approaching that tipping point.  For the most part, my life (and I) are moving smoothly along but, occasionally, something happens that causes introspection and self-doubt.  At those times I've found the best thing I can do is simply move forward one step at a time . . .acknowledging the doubt and pain but realizing that I am the master of my fate (at least I like to think so!) and I alone can make myself happy.  

"This above all, to thine own self be true, and it must follow as the night the day thou canst not then be false to any man."  

Interesting . . .

Sometimes news comes from unexpected places and is surprising enough to take your breath away - at least for a minute (or hour) or two.

But, in the end, rationality comes back and reminds you that it's ok and you're ok - just another reminder that things happen for a purpose even when you can't see the purpose clearly - and you're stronger, calmer and actually happier.  Good living is its own best revenge or so I've heard - all I know is that for me, going forward is just the way it has to be and it hasn't been a difficult road because I have great support.

I read recently:   I think the only way to move on is to forgive. Talk about the hardest thing in the world!!! It is easy to forgive people you like, but to forgive someone who has betrayed you deeply and doesn't even care - you feel like why bother! I'll tell you why - for yourself. Until you forgive them, you will not be able to move on.

Now, the forgiving part is not instant. It is not something that you can just wake up one day and say okay, I forgive them, all the anger and resentment is gone. You make the decision that way, but you have to remind yourself that you have forgiven them when the hard feelings swell up. Keep telling yourself that you forgive them, pray to forgive them, and eventually you will realize that you mean it and that you really do forgive them.

Rainy Sundays

Today is supposed to bring snow (at least tonight) but right now it's sprinkles - cold and dreary.  But I've gotten the groceries purchased and in the house (not totally put away), prescription refills orders (will pick up this afternoon - early).  Now just have laundry to do and a pot roast to cook.  Comfort food!!

Not much in the newspaper this morning - but there was a long article on the City's and School's budget - doesn't look good :(.

Now to finish putting away the non-perishables, start the laundry, dust and vacuum - just another rainy Sunday!!

Whew . . .

This past week was extremely busy - with 5 interviews, 2 long meetings, 1 training, 1 11 hour day and 1 retirement gathering.  It's no wonder that I came home Friday and was asleep a little after 8 (and awake again at 11:40!).    (not that there weren't some fun things in there too . . . ;-) )

So, although I did go back to sleep last night (or this morning) about 2 a.m. and woke up at 6:40 ensuring that I got almost 8 hours of total sleep, by 2 p.m. I was dragging!  So off to bed I went and got another 1 hour and 47 minutes of nap!  And an interesting nap it was too!  In addition to meaning that I'm now a bit groggy, it probably means that I won't be asleep tonight until well past 8!

Anyway, I'm glad that it's Saturday, that I have two days off from work in a row, and that it really doesn't matter if I can't fall asleep on time tonight because I don't have to be anywhere tomorrow at any particular time (although I've discovered that grocery shopping is better early than late on a Sunday!!).

New Things @ Work

My place of work is moving towards something new - new to us anyway - SharePoint.  Teams are going to be using it for collaboration work. One team that I'm on got its site today - we haven't had time to really work with it but we're used to having a wiki for our team's work and we maintain a blog that will still live outside the firewall - so it shouldn't be too hard to get used to this!

In many ways it's the same as we've been using but in some ways its not as simple or intuitive - especially for the computer challenged.  It will be interesting to see it develop and how everyone gets used to this new (to us) product!

February 2012

Room was looking particularly good so I had to take a picture!

Cleo's not on her ottoman in front of the fire (she was earlier and is right now) but Quincy is on his ottoman in front of the sofa and next to the laptop!

Good thing you can't see all the Cleo clumps of hair on the rug . . .

It's really the first day cold enough to enjoy the fire - gotta a love a fire you just have to "turn on" rather than "build".

(Cleo's favorite position when the fire is on and yes, that is a vase of wine corks!!)

Happy Valentine's Day

to my wonderful sons . . . .

(and no, I didn't make cupcakes!)




interesting - I just read that today is the Anti-Valentine's Day Day - at least a dating company has declared it - but that's just crazy - how can you dislike a holiday that is symbolized by chocolate?? :)

Lists and updates

I was remembering that I made a list last year of things that needed to be done - (from April 2011)

1. taxes done
2. dining room emptied of the stuff that doesn't belong there
3. dining room table back in the dining room!
4. bedroom rearranged
5. living room emptied of what doesn't belong there!!

and decided it was time for an update!! 

1. taxes done - well last year's were done - almost time to do them again!!
2. dining room still has a few things that don't belong there but it's minuscule compared to what it was!
3. dining room table has been in there and we had Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner there!!
4. bedroom rearranged - not so much :(
5. living room emptied of what doesn't belong - yes and rearranged!! :)

now for a new list - this one is going to cost more :(

1. replace the fence on the side of house, including a new gate
2. replace the railing at the front porch
3. curtains (or something) for the living room and dining room windows
4. painting the living room, dining room and foyer

That's enough for now!!  Will have to check back next year and see what's been accomplished!! 

La Cage aux Folles